Sunday, August 28, 2005

I Am Kloot / Gods and Monsters / Rating 6.0

Dry ice at a Backstreet Boys concert

A rating of 6.0 seems like a backhanded compliment in comparison to PFM’s actual review.
For instance:


“After two albums of post-Britpop mediocrity, Manchester trio I Am Kloot kick things up a notch (or think they do), and suffer from bipolarity and an ambition that outstrips their ability. The disc plays like a sex operation gone botched-- Adonis to Medusa in 10 minutes tops.”

“More problems arise when this band wants to be somebody's soundtrack-- all vampires and exotic places—“

“If you're looking for reference points, Cinerama's shtick isn't far off, except that was smart.”

“While it's true that stories don't tell themselves, Kloot's stories might speak volumes if Bramwell sang less.”

"I Am Kloot singer John Bramwell's execution is gloomily expressive at best, melodramatic as a rule, and when the Wurlitzers materialize like dry ice at a Backstreet Boys concert, shit's more exasperating than convincing-- and tiresome, too. "


I don’t understand, is a 6.0 a bad rating or is this record not terrible but worthy of as many biting comments as one can fit in a review? I wouldn’t think “Gods and Monsters” would appeal to PFM’s target market but these songs will easily win over a different kind of crowd.

Fans of Sondre Lerche would gladly welcome I Am Kloot to share a stage and their British brand of rainy day piano pop would nicely balance out the romantic crooning of the dashing Scandinavian man-child. This compatible combination would have the audience applauding all the way to their merch table.

PFM goes onto say:

"Hong Kong Lullaby" feels like a cheap shot at fluffy pillow-softness, offering respite from billowing swells of over-instrumentation but little else; "I Believe", a weirdly compelling Nick Drake anthem-cum-rescue mission, comes tacked on as a bedside prayer finale that also fails to salvage or move (to tears or otherwise) thanks to the tyranny of circumstance. *

*Dear music journalist,

Can we please please please try to avoid a Nick Drake comparison just because a song features an acoustic guitar and melancholy vocals? The world is big place filled with lots of sad people playing sad songs so lets try to mix it up a little. I beg you to use a new and varied point of reference in future reviews.

Thank You,
Tuningforkmedia



PS:My initial typing of “Gods and Monsters” held the awesome typo of “Cods and Monsters” I imagine this album would then feature nightmares from the deep sea. Oh never mind, Mastodon did that already.