I snooze I lose. I started writing this a few days ago and had the idea of taking bets on what the rating of XBXRX’s new record would be and now it’s a wasted bit of lite comedy. Oh well.
Here is what I was working on anyhow:
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I was listening to XBXRX’s newest cd Sixth in Sixes and I was curious to see if PFM reviewed it yet; nope.
It was then curiosity which led me to look up what they gave Gop Ist Minee, their debut release on 5RC/ Tapes Record / KRS back in 2000.
Wow. A brutal 2.6. The whole review is pretty funny but here are some highlights. Screw it, the whole thing is pretty funny so here it is in all its glory.
"MATAOW DOWBEE! MATOW DOWBEE SAY HEY! PEEESE GOH DONBEE THE SAY! AYCASTOBEE SAY! KEESTAY FODOO KAYDEBAY HEYDAY! MAYABALA BUHDOH FAYA SAHEY WAHAY! AAAAHH!! KAYSTUBA FODO SEHDEMA HEYEY! GOGOGO! THAY FO! NO! THAY FO STAO! TAYFAYHO! KAMAKEYO LEYMO SEEAOW! YUKUDA MEEOW LAAAA KAISUU MEEOWL AAAAAA!!
Well, will you look at that?! No, I'm not taking a class on primitive languages. In fact, it's doubtful that a language like that even exists. But that's what you get when you turn on Gop Ist Minee, the stateside debut from XBXRX. Apparently, it's supposed to be English. I think I even heard an English word somewhere on this record. Doesn't matter, though, because nearly every word is screeched and screamed in only the most annoying and high-pitched of fashions. For instance: remember that scene in Ace Ventura where he's trying to get through the head-banging club? Yeah. Well, imagine that on a gallon of helium and you've already paid for half of this album.
Of course, there's another half: the music. Gop Ist Minee opens with its best track-- a 25 second-long clip of a sped-up Casio keyboard demo. I know what you're thinking: "That's the best track? Why, it could only get worse from there!" Only too true, my friend. Only too true. Clichéd guitar lines from the math/thrash department breeze by as eleven more "songs" speed by in a mere 20 minutes. Frankly, I'd be hard pressed to distinguish one track from another, and I'm betting you would be, too. To fill things out, XBXRX have also included a limited assortment of electronic bweeEEows and swwsssshhhs here and there. (Only onomatopoeias of the most imbecilic order will do them justice.)
So facts is facts, and after these facts, I just can't see why you'd want to buy XBXRX. Of course, if you're a fan of annoying speed-thrash electronic garage-punk (with emphasis on "annoying"), then I suppose you could give it a shot. For the rest of you, don't. I mean it. "
-Spencer Owen
I can’t predict if PFM will review the new cd but my guess is considering the noise bands they bow down to these days they may not only review it, but they may even love it. I know I do but I don’t work for the Chicago indie rock mafia either.
So here is my question to you. Lets take bets on what Pitchfork will say about Sixth in Sixes in the year 2005.
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I can’t say I told you so cause well, I didn’t have a chance to tell you so earlier but its nice to see a little shift in PFM thinking / listening. In the end the band still gets a semi thumbs down but holy crap I love this noise fest for all its OCD-length of play time and delectable chaos.
A quote from the new review :
"It sounded like a wall of hysterics at first, but a few more listens and the complexity started to seep in. This is the band's second record, and they sound more mature and generally more competent at playing than on 2001's Gop Ist Minee, though they're no less confrontational."
But the final word is this : "the album is nothing to write home about."
So it’s a toss up considering XBXRX’s slight and slow hike in PFM rating . Either PFM will catch up with embracing this kind of band by the time their next record is made or the band will improve according to indie community standards and warrant a better review.
Either way you look at it they are practically destined to be a 9. something band next time around.
